Movies

DVD Review: Curse of the Wolf

Curse of the Wolf

Echo Bride

Terrible acting isn’t just a failure to emote, its a fundamental inability to understanding  how emotions work.  It’s kind of like cooking; a dish which tastes like nothing is still preferable to a dish that tastes like rancid eggs.

To learn more about terrible acting (and makeup and cinematography and lighting, and soundtracks, and fight choreography), see Curse of the Wolf.

 

Dakota is a nondescript blond lady with no particular character traits, aside from a constant nervousness.  She’s being chased by a pack of werewolves that want her to join her pack, as they’ve already infected her with their werewolf juice, but she ain’t having none of that!

The lead wolf, Michael, speaks in an odd combination of cliches and psudo-motivational speech.  It’s like they were going for a Tarantino-esque villain, but had neither the script nor the actor to pull it off.

Let me just pause here to talk about the werewolf ‘makeup.’  From the neck down, they’re just normal people (sometimes with a wolf glove, or a sprig of hair, but usually not); on their faces, they either have a cheap Halloween mask or an amorphous blob of brown latex that doesn’t look the slightest bit like a wolf.

Anyways, Dakota finds her way to a bar which is owned by some guy with a posse who decides to help her for some reason. The bar people and the wolves clash, a few people die, and the movie limps along to an ending that doesn’t make a lot of sense.

Ivy, one of the bar man’s group, is played by Darian Caine, who is famous for starring in soft-core erotic horror films.  She has a full frontal nude scene in the movie, but it’s so dark and the camera is so cheap that you can barely make it out.  I bring up the scene because it also features a very strange music choice, a kind of low-fi indie-pop song called ‘Teetah The Cat Lady,’ by Victory Galinsky.  You can hear the song on her website.  Now, play the song on her site, and then picture a scene in which a man walks in on Darian in the bath, and then she jumps out and points a gun at him.  Do those two elements (fine on their own) gel together to make a more effective whole?

I’ll say this for Curse of the Wolf, the people making it seemed to be having fun.  It wasn’t a cynical attempt to fleece the audience with cheap violence and sex, it was a serious attempt to do something good.  A lot of the casts boasts of their martial arts training and of doing their own stunts, but those scenes, again, are filmed so poorly that whatever skill they may have is lost.  And to make matters worse, they slapped on some cartoon sound effects whenever someone is hit.

It’s incompetent by virtually every metric, but there are some weird elements that catch your attention, and there’s a lot to laugh at (though not what the film makers intended).

The movie was included in an eight movie, two disc set from budget publisher Echo Bridge, called the ‘Horror Cinema Eight Movie Pack.’ This one was presented in  non-anamorphic widescreen and looks pretty bad.

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